No Matter What, I Love You
by Izumi's Apprentice
Summary: Regina still loved Snow despite all of their differences. A look at three different points in Regina's life as Queen and Mayor Mills. Might be considered a prequel to "A Second Second Chance" but it wasn't intentional.


Disclaimer: I write this story purely for entertainment purposes and claim no ownership of the Once Upon a Time storyline or the versions of the characters within said franchise.

Author's Notes: Second OUaT story set in Fairytale Land before The Evil Queen (as in the persona). I couldn't imagine the feelings of Regina towards Snow when they first met and the whole time they lived together in Snow's childhood to be forgotten so easily so I tried to explore that. More basically, I was exploring Regina's capacity for love as the Queen.

Regina's Love

Regina did love the child. She just couldn't understand why she snitched. To her mother of all people. Oh...key word "child". She hadn't heard of her mother, well not many people knew of the witch's prowess to begin with. Cora attempted to keep it under lock and key so she wouldn't be suspected of causing trouble. Or more likely, causing the rise in power of their family into immediately succeeding royalty. Regina gathered that her mother had something to do with Snow's runaway horse but the woman had refused to answer her so she wasn't positive. Despite her anger—or was it overwhelming disappointment—Regina did love her step-daughter. It was hard not to love that sweet, affectionate girl who tried her hardest to please everyone in the castle no matter how low on the totem they were. It was the only light in her life right now. King Leopold was a kind and generous man to his kingdom and people, but he did not love her and would probably never love her. She walked behind him in the shadow of Queen Eva. She once asked Snow how she felt about Regina's new position in her life and the child had exuberantly told her how happy it made her to have another female figure in her life. Yes she missed her mother, but she kept the memory of Eva inside her and got to know Regina, not in a comparison, but as another person. That brought the young queen a sliver of relief.

She sat outside by her apple tree, looking over the wall at the glade in which young Snow was taking a riding lesson. Every time the child looked her way and waved, Regina couldn't help but smile, waving back as well. Her gaze was once again brought to her tree. They had much in common. Only one person loved them and they were both trapped inside that castle never truly belonging there. It was a cruel fate forced upon her, but she tried to find the silver lining in every day. Of course, that silver was slowly starting to dull and become a grey the more time passed her by. A frown graced her lips as she stared at the tree.

So consumed in her thoughts and anguish, the young queen didn't notice the approach of a man, who plucked an apple from its home before holding it out in the peripheral of the girl. "Apple?" he asked.

Regina looked over, a smile spreading across her face as quickly as the sun lit up the sky after the night was gone. "Daddy..." she said sweetly, standing up to hug him briefly. "Thank you." She took the apple and sat down again, taking a delicate bite out of it as her eyes remained on the man she loved. Slowly Henry sat down, hands fidgeting with his suit coat as though he bared bad news for his daughter. Regina was no fool, she recognized this nervous habit of her father's, but hoped whatever he had to say wasn't as bad as he thought it was. "Daddy, what's the matter?" She asked leaning toward him.

"My dear..." he started, taking a deep breath after. "I have...heard talk about a new heir. About how the time has come to create a new heir, a son, for the King."

The woman all but dropped her apple as her hands fell to her lap and her mouth parted in surprise. No... She didn't want a child. Not like this. Not with him. Not when... "Daddy," Regina murmured, hugging her father tightly.

"I know, sweetheart," he said, rubbing her back soothingly. "We'll make it through this. I promise."

Regina got pregnant three times by King Leopold before the endeavor was given up. Each time, the child never came to term or even the second trimester for that matter. Upon his daughter's plea, Henry had obtained the cures and kept them stashed in the castle for when Regina was found to be with child. She knew it would be suspicious if the child was lost at the same time or right after finding out, so when she was pregnant again, she took the cures at a later date. And later still on the third attempt. King Leopold and the rest of the castle believed it wasn't in the stars for there to be a son in the family and thus gave up.

The young queen, currently in mourning of her third loss of child, sat out on a balcony overlooking the pasture the horses were allowed momentary freedom. Her head was resting against the stone behind her and her eyes were narrowed. She had grown colder each time she got pregnant, now used to killing the child inside of her. It amazed Regina however, that her mother had yet to determine that it wasn't fate that failed to allow the child life. That it was by human hands. Regina wanted a child, she knew that, but not King Leopold's. She knew it would give her mother more power, that she would be pushed aside even further than she was before, and that her son would suffer. She didn't want to allow that so she took the remedies and put a stop to the madness before it could begin.

The handmaids and servants tried to get their queen to remain in her bedchambers so soon after the loss, but Regina pushed past them to enjoy the fresh air while she could. For all she knew she could be replaced at any moment with a women more 'fertile' than her if the King was so desperate for a male heir. Of course, this brought a pang of sadness to the woman because it meant that Snow wouldn't inherit the throne. She would be pushed aside like Regina already was. That was the price of being a woman in this society.

A clamor by one of the entrances to the balcony caught Regina's attention and her eyes looked in that direction to determine what was going on.

"Please, let me pass. I wish to spend time with my step-mother. Johanna, tell them to let me pass please," came the calm but determined voice of young Snow. Soon she came out on to the balcony, Regina's eyes back on the pasture once more. "Regina?" Snow asked.

"Yes, Snow?"

"I am so sorry you will not be having my baby brother or sister," she said as she sat down against the wall by the queen. Regina's lips quirked up at the thought of having a daughter instead of a son. Wouldn't that have put nails in the coffin of King Leopold's legacy?

"Thank you," Regina stated, taking a deep breath. Snow's eyes slowly followed her step-mother's as she relaxed a little.

"It's such a lovely day out. Perhaps you should go for a walk," the girl suggested kindly.

"I may have the energy to walk about the castle, but I do not believe I have the energy or permission to walk about the grounds alone."

"Why would you need permission to walk the grounds?" Naive Snow questioned.

Regina turned to the look at the girl, wondering if she should explain this to the child or not. "Well...after this foolish affair of trying to provide an heir began, I have been more keenly watched by your father's men...and my mother also. Leaving to spend time on my own has become a game a chess I do not wish to play. I feel like a dove caught in a cage; not truly belonging where she is kept locked away."

"That must be horrible," Snow looked down at her hands, eyebrows quirked up and sympathy for the woman. "What if! What if I talked to my father about giving you more freedom?" She asked excitedly, grinning at the queen.

"No, Snow, you don't have to do that for me."

"I want to. I wouldn't like being trapped in a cage when the world is such a beautiful place to be," Snow said, sighing.

"Fine," was all Regina said. Even if King Leopold agreed to loosen the security upon his young wife, she knew her mother would still watch her like a hawk. Perhaps it was time to do something about that. She couldn't live with Cora always over her shoulder, spinning the world into her own personal agenda.

"Regina?"

"Yes, Snow?" Regina responded, sighing heavily at this interruption.

"I'm glad you're my step-mother."

She could remember a time when watching the young girl cry would have made her happy, but all it did now was cause her heart to race and a pang to grow in her throat. She abandoned that love years ago. Why was it coming back now of all times? She hated her, why did she feel sympathy? Especially after what Mary Margaret did. Looking back on the event, she hadn't felt bad at that exact moment, but now she was feeling sorry for the woman. Killing wasn't easy, despite how much life she had taken, she still hated thinking about it, especially now that she had turned a new leaf. She couldn't forgive her though. Never. This was just another tick under the reasons why she hated Snow White.

But Regina could never hate Snow White or Mary Margaret long and this was no exception. They had spent too long together. There was a time when Regina loved Snow and an even long time that Snow loved Regina. It was there despite the denial.


End file.
